Crying It Out!!

When I was pregnant with Georgia, everyone said that I would do things differently with her than I had Riley - that because she was my second child, I wouldn't be as anxious about things so I would be a lot more "go with the flow". So far, that seems to be coming true.

You see when Riley was born, my closest mom-friend was my sister-in-law Kellie. Dayla had been born two years earlier and so I had a great opportunity to see Kellie in action and take lots of notes for when I became a mother. Lucky for me, Kellie and I agree on about 99% of parenting issues.

When it came to sleeping, Kellie and Clay had always rocked or bounced Dayla to sleep, so when Riley came along, I did the same thing.

For the first 4 months of Riley's life, she was a great napper and nighttime sleeper. Then, to the day that she turned 4 months, she started waking up early from naps and would only go back to sleep if I rocked her. Then, 15 minutes later it would all happen again. I began spending hours in her nursery trying to get her to sleep. I was at my whits end, when I talked to another mom friend of mine, Tracy Moore, who had put her children down awake, allowing them to teach themselves to fall asleep. I was desperate and so I decided to try it. I didn't have enough will power to just let her cry endlessly, so I would rock her for a few minutes, not to get her to sleep, but to soothe her. Then I would lay her down. I would return to her room at 5, 10 and 15 minute intervals to calm her down. Let me tell you - the first few weeks were absolute torture. A 4-month old has a lot of energy and strong lungs, so she could go for quite a while. She was also having to break all of the bad sleep habits that I had trained her to have. But, once she figured out how to soothe herself, let me tell you - it was fantastic!! Since that time, I have been able to go into her room, lay her down and walk out. Then, when she wakes up, she just sits and plays until I return. She even does this now that she has her big girl bed. She has not once tried to climb down (I should probably knock on wood at this point:)

So when Georgia was born, I knew that I would handle her sleep training differently. First of all, I knew that my time would be more limited when getting her down for nap, because of Riley. Secondly, I knew I couldn't put myself through what I had done with Riley. So, Georgia was only 8 days old when I started putting her down awake. I swaddle her, hold her without rocking for 5 minutes, and then lay her down in her crib. To this day, she has not cried for more than 5 minutes when falling asleep. Occasionally she will wake up in the middle of her nap and cry for a few minutes, but she has learned to get herself back to sleep.

I wanted to write about this, because I remember when I started letting Riley cry it out, I felt a lot of guilt. I felt that as a mother I was supposed to be nurturing her and soothing her, not letting her scream at the top of her lungs. But, what I realized was that it was my responsibility to teach her to become a good sleeper by allowing her to learn to soothe herself.

If you are in the midst of letting your little one "cry it out" I would recommend two books regarding sleep habits for babies - "Babywise" and "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby". I reference them all the time!